Why do i need a girl-friend !

Caveat: This entry is supposed to be sexist. My horoscope says that i'll win a Crore if I be sexist for a moment. "I AM NOT LIKE THIS"

This is the last single entry on my life (liar liar!!)
For all u desperate girls out there-call me at 9420420420

To show-off
I know most of the men out there will agree that girl friends are a little difficult to walk with.
I am not referring to their slow gait in tight trousers ..but figuratively. Not many of us
actually like to walk on a busy road with a girl friend in tow? But we are forced to do that
because of peer pressure. As a 24-year-old gentleman I spoke to last night put it: “Ritesh has
one, Prakash has one and even that dud Sunil has one. Won’t I be considered a loser if I
don’t have a girl friend?”

To increase bank balance
Surprising for sure … but GFs do come quite handy. To pay credit card bills when the bankers come chasing, to pay phone bills when the connections are cut, to pay the rent when the landlord threatens….we all need girl friends. But are these girls doing it for us? No way…instead they do it for their own selfish needs. If the credit card is blocked…she won’t be taken to the restaurant, if the phone connection stays pulled…no late night romantic calls…and if there is no house to go back to…what about those private moments?

To feel wanted on birthdays
If I didn’t have girl friends, I might as well have forgotten my birthdays. If you are an obnoxious bastard like me-you what i mean. You need friends to lighten up and girl-friends to remember those moments.
But, this one comes with the catch-be prepared to give her the treat. A big one.
The thumb rule of birthdays spent with a girl friend is: “The total cost of the gifts will always be less than the cost of the evening dinner.”
But having been used to women pampering us all our lives…we don’t mind the cost. What we mind is the settling down and having kids and naming him/her….Akaash/Arpita… so that he/she could be first in the attendance register…kind of talk. Especially on happy days like birthdays.

For emergency back-up
The thing about emergencies is…if they start happening too often they cease to be
emergencies. Many a times we men need liquid cash for important things like a can of beer
or a movie ticket. We need moral support because the girl we approach happened to be the
daughter of the local dada. Or we need to be dropped at the railway station because we have
given our bike/car for servicing. If you ask me, we men need to credit the ladies for the unstinted support they provide us when we are in trouble.
Papa told to me once: Don’t trouble trouble until trouble troubles you. But in this case the trouble itself comes forward to help us.

For use as a digital diary
Men don’t have good memory. Perhaps that is why we invest so much on our mobile
phones. And perhaps, that is why you should have no hassles investing in a live digital diary
–a girl friend. I am sure there have been many occasions when she has alerted you at the
right time. Like when you have to wake up and for an interview. Or maybe a medical checkup?
Or maybe catching a train on Friday evening? A woman’s memory is a yet-to-be-tapped
resource. Try it and I am sure you won’t be disappointed.

Eyecandy: To add glamour to life
Who doesn’t love to have a lady nearby? I do. The F1 guys do. Even Manmohan Singh does.
This wouldn’t have been an issue if the ladies didn’t know it. Now that it is out in the open men
can’t help. Knowing our weakness …the ladies have started presenting themselves as show
pieces. In fact, now they have learnt they can get men to do more if they are Eyecandy. Bad Evolution. Darwin Sir-"can we reverse this?"

To book tickets
I am sure your girl friend has also done this for you. Be it movie, train, bus, theatre, or restaurants….they have booked at all places. Perhaps because when the lady speaks…the man at the other end melts. After all, he is also one of us. The good thing about getting your girl friend to book tickets for you is…she finds it cheap to ask for the money…hence uses her own. ;)


Everybody needs a gossip machine
Agreed we men are not gossip machines. But it doesn’t hurt to get a dose of this and that
once in a while. Especially, if it is about the escapades of our girl’s pretty friend. It gives us
an idea of what chance we stand. The one problem with this requirement is…the phone
companies start sending you huge bills.

As the first-level shock absorber
According to the ladies, men don’t have an eye for colours. Guess, we should start wearing
more of beige, pink and peach. But then, without these ladies we would have gone out to the
World looking stupid. Without them who will tell us our zip is not up, our face has an extra
dash of powder, our shirt goes well with the trouser but has a stain on the wrong hand or that we need a shave.

The Tenth Reason
I leave this to you. After all i'm not the only one looking for a mate.
For Girls: "I'm your guy"
For Guys: "I know what your tenth reason is!"


PS: Just reminding again. "I AM NOT LIKE THIS"