Midnight thoughts

Why do strange thoughts dawn after midnight? Is it because you’re alone? A feeling of freedom that you can brood on things that were unsolicited in daylight. Are unguarded emotions your guilty pleasure? Do you feel immoral, prudent, do you question, do you blush and kiss yourself goodnight?
Am I going anywhere with this? No, yes, maybe, almost, naaah……. I am not going to write about one thing in particular. I’ll write everything and nothing. Yeah, I am that lame.

There will be no explanation, just random questions piled up together. Put together as and how they slip in, quiet and innocent.

Did Murphy dream? He was so happy to put facts as they are. Did he dream? Did he dare? Was he scared? Scared that he can’t explain them? Am I being him? Another one, I know, it will make no sense. Is it supposed to? Don’t you stumble upon thoughts and are just too busy to comprehend them?

Well, is there a beast in us? Will he turn barbaric when let lose? Are rules made to curb us so that we bear each other? Is there sense in that? The beast is pure, all by itself, honest. Are we forcing it in? Are we scared of that face of ours, too difficult to come to terms with the might in us? Too disgusted at what we are capable of? Do we take pleasure in it?

Are things happening to you because of Karma? What goes around comes around? Can’t anything happen by accident? Is the accident planned too? By who? God? stars?, your b’day? Murphy? Am I losing it? Have I lost it? Did I have it? What is ‘it’?

Why do we worry about the future? Why do we make lists? Car? House? Foreign trip? Two children or three? Loose 20 kilos.
Why do we feel let down if we don’t get them? Asking question is easy, you say? Answering them is tough. Do I want answers? No. I want them inconclusive. Another night another passing thought. It’s what keeps me up.

Arbit !

Presenting to my esteemed readers.. wtf.. guys, here is the list of things i just do not get. please refrain from using any of these as my birthday presents/bribe/topic for a conversation/ and God forbid a debate.

1. Art. The so called 'Modern' one: - I really won’t pay crores for something that looks like its painted by a kid gone awry with the colours, high on sugar and drugs.

2. Stock Market. The blue screens going haywire, numbers flying all around. People still so involved. And why not, for a pee-break may cost you a million rupees. I guess they imagine about a Mallika Sawant changing.
As many as 5 news channel blabber all day, making money, trying to make viewers understand what the hell this thing means.
Per day volume these news channel make: 50 crores.
You can wrap the world 3 times over with the newspapers + magazines that are printed per day, all over the world.
Who gives a damn. From the next time please do not talk about Vanilla Options with Future Options and Hedging benefits.

3. My neighbor. I have been living in the same building for almost 2 years now. Mind you im a student. I have no clue who/what our neighbors are. Not one. Not a clue.
They all act like they are undercover spy agents. This guy/gal/animal can put a CIA to shame. And he does'nt wear a black coat.

4. Doctor’s Handwriting. . I guess these doctors either dinn have access to cursive writing books when they were kids, or love their fingers so much that they ant put them through any effort. I now am feeling bad for the chemists who have to read through their writing for a living.

5. Hurry. I simply do not understand why are people always in 'so' much hurry.
'Yaar thoda thand rakho'. Stand on any railway platform in Mumbai and u'll get what im tring to say. It seems as if they get a Gold in the Olympics for being first to get a piece of wood under his ass. Gosh. Frantic as they get, they just forget about the entire world-their kids, wives . Everyone. They run faster than Bolt and Powell. Guess this should be accepted as an Olympic Sport.

6. Data.
- If you shout for 8 years, 6 months, 2days you’d produce enough sound energy to heat a cup of coffee.
- Polar bears cover their nose with their paws as camouflage.
- A gold fish has a memory of 3 seconds.
Why? Why do I know this information? Am I going to shout for 8 years, 6 months, 2 days and am I at war with a Polar bear that I should be alert that some camouflaged bear would trick me. The gold fish. I’m almost happy it has a lousy memory. At least it does not store the crap that I have stored.

7. Kids. They are like a different species all together.
A year ago i saw a cute lil child walking around with a school-bag that must have been a ton. I asked him 'Hello beta, what's your name? Bag uthane main help kar dun?'
Reply: 'None of your business'
Sheesh yaar. They like mud. They like ShinChan who makes such an irritating gnawing sound when he eats-10 mins is enough for you to have a brain hemorrhage.
They are so dumb that they will kill for anything shiny and fast. Still-that brat did not understand that i was trying to help. Silly species.
No wonder i call my roomy KID :)

8. Bees.
Something buzzed in my left ear.
I vigorously tried to shake it off.
It wouldn't go.
I said Shit.
It still wouldn't.
I said Fuck.
It still wouldn't.
I said What the fucking hell.
It still wouldn't.

I hate bees !

The National Drink !

Ballmer's peak: The optimum level of Alcohol Concentration in blood.


I love beer !
I loved Programming !
I may love Marketing !
but i love beer !

National Drink for sure.

Amitabh Bachhan

AMITABH BACHHAN..


Frankly yaar... this man should take a break or something. Or stare into a crystal ball or something. Wherein all will be white owing to his vision being clouded.
By cataracts.
Owing to him being ancient.

That the man should continue to act despite that Jhoom Baraabar Jhoom eye-vomit costume speaks of bravery that is well worthy of the Four Square Bravery Award, but he must realize we, the poor audience, aren't quite in the same league.

So why am I, evidently minus the baritone, the salt-pepper french, 6-foot frame and the eye-vomitness of it all, forcing myself upon you unsuspecting people who love this guy. ?.

It is in view of finding myself in situations that are far too absurdly idiotic for them to go without being considered thus by a hundred other people as well. Yes, I do need approval from random strangers that there is action in my life and that you are in awe of it. But then again, that is in direct contradiction to the well-accepted adage which when very succinctly put reads, Blogs happen when nothing else does.
Well, who said I was perfect?

What I am though, is a guy. A mean one.

I am completely aware of the uber-mensch implications of the above line; thank you very much. But yes, that very line was told to an audience of awestruck individuals in the confines of the department of Accounts by a man we will henceforth be referred to as Krajni.
Why Krajni? another entry required for that.

Children of Nothing.

Dec '07
Its a no-brainer that we are the children of nothing.

There's no great war that defined our resilience, when we could all break out in choruses of Vande Mataram.

No great depression that tested our perseverance, when we could end up solving Sudoku in 'Sanmarg'.

No freedom struggle, when freedom fighters sang 'Ekla cholo re' and we sang 'Tutak Tutak' while going to the bathroom and feel we are part of something larger.

No counter culture movement, when we could pretend we loved Joan Baez and Jefferson Airplane, and spew diatribes while high.

No Emergency, when we could shuffle around in Fab India kurta and feel important, all the while we debate about anti-dumping and China.

Agreed we have the internet and free porn and sites to download free music from, but what good it is. Agreed we have reality shows we could cry and hoarse about and be known as the voice of India, if you know what I mean (of course you do); but Derek O'Brien is doing that already anyway.
Agreed we have Global Warming and Al Gore and electric cars and Leo DiCaprio, but that is like 12,ooo miles away.
Agreed we have the Beijing Olympics and the prospect of a Tienanmen square, but what chances that Jeff Widener pops up there and I get to be The Unknown Rebel? I am sure NMIMS wouldn't give me permission to so much as go to Samastipur, let alone go to Beijing and face a bunch of tanks.
Agreed we have cloning, but have you heard a name beyond Dolly? Agreed we have the Spirit and the Opportunity too, but we would get to Mars sooner than we would get Deve Gowda dead, which is never.

So really, nothing defines us, unless you want to call us The Undefined and sound like a Clint Eastwood film, which is never a good thing. Do these bomb blasts define us? No, they don't. They just define Breaking News, in a weird literal way.

I/We represent nothing. I/We represent nobody. We are all a motley crowd defined by nothing new. Do not even get me started on the iPhone.
As a management student in NMIMS, I am a bottom dweller. There is nobody beyond me on this side. And there was a time I used to say the exact same words, and feel exactly the opposite. Though i never orders from people who are aberrations in the concept of evolution, from people who are human mutations of the bird species that went extinct in Mauritius.
As i spent half of my 2 yrs sleeping and the other half watching movies. I just thanked God that i did not go along to become a doctor.
I would have laughed my head off trying to resuscitate a patient three heartbeats away from death and the radio in the ER screams Kaanta Lagaa...".

I sometimes get confused about the meal I am having. Supper, lunch, dinner, breakfast, snack... all different words for the same thing - Carbohydrates. All my friends also are like always a nameless, faceless, pair of legs that locomotes, and carries with it a pair of hands that can write, and a pair of vocal cords that says "Yes, ma'am" to the call of "You who's sleeping in the back.. go bang head against wall."

I have come to hate people, because people always have something to say, and it invariably involves inflation, innovation, strategize, USp, blah blah.. fucking blah.

I am traipsing a path dangerously close to both insanity and indifference. It's tragic that I don't stick to one side.
There is so much I can tell you all about how disgusting and how exhilarating being in a management institute can be. The transition between the two does not take longer than two seconds at times. But that's for another post another time. Or for another book, which, going by my atrophied brain status would be called something as imaginative as The Devil Wears A Red Hat or something.
For now, I gotta run. There is some proff throwing super convulsions because I did not get some report (that nobody gives a shit about anyway).

The travails, the travesty, and other such trash.
Ah, an MBA