Tuesday, November 4, 2008

The Bro Code

Now fellow comrades on the internet space. I know that over the years you have got lamer than you ever were (or will be).
Instead of watching porn on the internet, you read my blog!!
But there is hope. Do not worry. Do not kill yourself.

There are a few things that transcend beyond materialistic and godly pleasures of the world (like porn & hot babes). That is friendship!

Laid out in front of you is the BRO code (This is only for males; for females-get a sex-change operation 1st; for gays-i'm not your friend; for lesbians-i love you!)

So the BRO Code (adapted from How I Met Your Mother)
ARTICLE 26
"A bro will, in a timely manner, alert his bro to the existence of a girl fight."
A Bro must never hesitate before communicating the possibility of fisticuffs between two humans of the female variety [[HENCEFORTH "GIRL FIGHT"]], in an effort to make possible and probable that another Bro or Bros can partake in observation..
If an informed Bro is unable to witness the girl fight firsthand, the spotter Bro is responsible for documenting and relating details of the girl fight via pictures, video*, or barring any other reasonable method, interpretive dance and/or pantomime.

ARTICLE 53
"A Bro will, whenever possible, provide his Bro with protection."
In the event that one Bro finds himself lacking the necessary prophylactic accoutrements (supportive equipment) needed to complete the act of coitus in a safe and effective manner, he is in the right to expect his Bro will use all measures within or without his means to provide the aforementioned accoutrement in a timely yet discreet fashion.
In no instance may a two-wheeled bicycle be used* as this is not only humiliating, but also potentially harmful to the perineum - a zone of tissue perilously adjacent to noted sexual organs.
ARTICLE 89
"A Bro will, never ever, sleep when talking to the bro-nterpart."
Be it here resolved that at no point is the bron-servation (conversation between bro's) stupid and boring. Henceforth it is allowed and encouraged for both Bro's to engage in meaningful conversations at late night, esp after 12. Also this act is in no means even closer of being Gayish. This conversation can also be carried out with the members of the "other sex".

PS: Andy, I made it possible. You are charged with serious violations of Articles 26 and 53!
Madam M: You are charged with extremely high degree of mental assault vide article 89 !

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